It's been a year and a half since my last post.
A lot has happened in the last year and a half.
And a lot hasn't.
We have decided (I have decided?) to move on to donor eggs this summer, after one last try with my own eggs in April.
S pretty much defers to me on all the child-having decisions. He admits that while he knows he will love our children dearly, he just can't get invested in the idea of them until they are here. He doesn't spend every waking hour thinking of every possible repercussion to every possible decision as I do. And so in this part of our lives, I am the decider.
And I have decided that I want to get off this merry-go-round and get on with my life. I want to be a mom. I want to raise children.
There is so much that has gone into this decision. It hasn't come easily. Maybe I will come back and process it all here.
Or maybe I won't post again for another year and a half.
We'll see.
