Q&A (it's almost go time)

39 + 4







Q: When are you due?

A:  Friday is 40 weeks. Thursday I am scheduled to start induction. Today is Tuesday. The Month is March. The years is 2016. I'm due March 11, 2016.

Q: Boy or girl?

A: Boy!

Q: How was this boy conceived?

A: With lots of love and science

Q: Has this pregnancy been hard?

A: Once we got passed the initial "will he stick around" phase, this pregnancy has been a total cake walk. I mean, there was mild nausea in the beginning, insane heartburn and acid reflux throughout, gross, troll-like swelling in my feet for the duration - but otherwise, I have honestly felt pretty great. And I have been freaking, crazy productive. Take that, pregnancy brain promoters.

Q: What's a pregnancy brain promoter?

A: People who insist that pregnancy = not being able to think. Or do much of anything. Certainly not be productive at anything other than months of baby prepping. Now, I absolutely recognize that every pregnancy is different and I've been incredibly lucky. But I also think there is a lot of silliness out there that says once you are expecting, you must cease to be effective at your job and you must only be able to talk and think about baby related things. I actually had someone try to convince me (another woman!) that women lose 4 IQ points per child. She was so certain of this fact, she read a study after all, that I had to go and look it up myself. The study was a joke. That she clearly did not get. Instead, she believed it 100% and tried to convince others of it in the WORKPLACE. Heaven help us all.

Q: So what have you accomplished while being pregnant?

A: I planned and executed a national conference. Not just event planning, but content planning -The Whole Thing (with help, of course - but I lead it). I continued to develop training programs and manage people. I completed a certification. Oh, and I opened up a therapy center with my husband. I basically have worked two jobs since October. And both jobs required a great deal of thinking and planning and executing. To say I am proud of what I have accomplished would be a huge understatement. I have kicked ass.

Q: So now that baby boy is almost here, will you quit your jobs and be a good stay at home mom?

A: No. And I'm so tired of this question. I hate all aspects of it. Especially the assumption that staying at home is best for the child and working should just be if you *have* to. But if you can afford to stay at home, and choose to work, then you must be one of those "career women" who need to climb a corporate ladder for personal validation and need to make enough money to pay for her fancy shoes and purses. UGH. No, no one has said this to me verbatim. Yes, multiple people have said this to me in a very round-about, coded sort of way. To set the record straight, I am not and never have been a ladder climbing career person. I have enjoyed a good deal of success over the years. But that has been purely a byproduct of the fact that I actually enjoy working. I have worked since I was 12 years old. I get immense satisfaction from creating and contributing and expressing myself out in the world and I find providing financially for myself and now my family to be very rewarding. Working hard is a deeply ingrained value of mine and one that I never anticipated turning off when I became a mom. In fact, I think it is even more important as a mom. Girls with mothers who work grow up to be more effective in their careers and make more money. Boys with mothers who work grow up to be better partners because they are more inclined to share home and work responsibilities equally. It's true. Look it up. Now, will it be easy for me to leave my baby and go back to the office while he is in daycare? No. I've already shed tears about this and I know there will be more to come. It will be a bitter sweet transition. Much like every single aspect of parenting. But I know that does not make it the wrong choice. It's just that underlying grief that accompanies every transition in life. And I support women who choose to stay home.  Anecdotally, everyone I know who has made the choice to stay home never enjoyed working in the first place, even as a carefree single woman. They hated it. They couldn't wait to have a baby and an excuse to stay home. And I'm totally cool with that - when they own it. It's when they try to turn their choice into a morally superior choice - claiming their decision is based on what is best for the CHILD. That's when I call bullshit.

Rant done.

Q: Are you ready for baby boy to arrive?

A:  I think so? I don't ever know how to answer that question. Can you ever, truly be ready? I doubt it. But I think we're as ready as we can be. Nursery is all set. Loose ends have been tied up at both work and therapy center. Dogs are groomed. House is as clean as it will ever be. I suppose we are totally ready for everything to devolve into complete chaos.

That's all I have time for now. Sorry for grammatical errors. Hope to be back here soon. But it might just be in another year. Who knows.

Peace and love

We're having a baby!